Life in the Fat Lane


































Illustrations by Michael Kirwan

Story by William Cozad   

Previously published in Honcho - March, 1991


The candid confessions of a chubby chaser...




I like my men big. Always have. Under two hundred pounds, I throw 'em back. There's just something about those big daddies that always gets my heart pounding and my cock oozing.

They say that big men were once popular in the Samoan Islands because people thought they knew where the food supply was. They also say that fat men need to look in the mirror to see their dicks. But I don't care about all that. While growing up and watching television, other guys might have lusted over Ricky Nelson, Bud Anderson and Wally Cleaver. But not me. I got off on Broderick Crawford, Perry Mason and Frank Cannon.

To me these hombres were hot. I lusted after them. Jerked off while watching them. Creamed my jeans. With big men there is always more to love. You can use that belly or that ass as love handles. Slat some fat; you know, blubber-fuck. The possibilities are endless. You can even invite a friend along since there is enough meat for everybody. But I am the jealous type. And I wanted a big guy all to myself.


After graduation from high school, while other guys chased after girls, I secretly searched for the big man of my dreams. Living in a small town there weren't a lot of places to look. But I went to the movie theater, checked out the men's room in the shopping mall and cruised the bus station john.


Sure I got to look at some dick. And I pulled my prick a lot on the sly. But still nothing-until one fine day I spotted this big man hanging out in the bus depot toilet.

He was perfect. Seeing him made my shorts wet. And I think I drooled at the mouth a little too.

He was over six foot tall. Huge shoulders. Big gut, maybe a beer belly. Thinning blond hair. Steel blue eyes. Hands like hams ... love at first sight.

From the mirror above the sink you could see the urinals and I hoped he'd take a leak. Boy, that thought got my motor running. The very idea of him reaching under that flabby belly to take hold of his cock to piss! What I could do with that guy! Bury my face in it. Knead it. Lick it. Oh, yeah, and jack off between the folds like straight guys do with big boobs. Just as cute as the Pillsbury doughboy to me, they are. But alas, no such luck; the object of my affection didn't have to whiz.

I went to the urinal to piss anyway but couldn't because my cock got hard. Even when I adjusted it in an upright position it strained for release. All I could think about was who the hell was this guy? A traveling salesman maybe? He wore a cheap tan suit and from the looks of his crumpled shirt, it was a safe guess he'd been on the road all day.

Standing at the mirror I combed my hair for the umpteenth time. The fat guy pretended to read a folded newspaper but I saw him glancing around. Then he walked toward me. "Waiting for a bus?" His voice was deep and sexy.

"Uh, no, I live near here."

It was a good thing there was no one else in the toilet. I was as skittish as a cat. But if I had my way I'd get him into a toilet stall and chew on his weenie. Or maybe he had a room at the hotel. If that was the case he could strip naked and I'd lose myself in all that blubber.

"What are you doing hanging around the toilet?" He flashed a badge and ID card. His gold badge said "police detective". And his name was Neal according to the ID card.

"You're a cop?"

"I asked you a question."

"Oh ... I was just passing by and I had to go, you know."

"I think you're one of those perverts."

"No I'm not."

"Where do you live? Let's see some ID."

I showed him my state ID card.

"Says you're eighteen."

"That's right."

"Got a job?"

"No, but I'm looking."

"You on the other side of town? Well, come along with me."


"I have some more questions. Walk out of here peacefully or I can cuff you."

"I'll do whatever you say."

I wasn't scared about going to jail. I hadn't done anything wrong. But I was real nervous just being around him. He was exactly what I liked--a big daddy, fortyish. And an authority figure like Matthews, Mason and Cannon!

The cop walked out of the bus depot with me and we got into his old green Ford parked at the curb by the fire hydrant. As he drove toward the outskirts of town, I began feeling a bit uneasy. Maybe he knew I was gay although I hadn't ever done anything with another guy before. Maybe he'd beat me up to teach me a lesson, punish me for hanging out at the bus depot toilet. Never mind that my cock was stiff in my pants. This fat detective, fat dick as I thought of him, turned me on no end. Before long he pulled over and parked on a deserted country road.

"What do you want with me?" I asked, hopeful of certain possibilities.

"I was staking out the bus station, looking for fugitives passing through town on the buses when I spotted you."

"I didn't do anything wrong."

"Stop whimpering," he snarled.


"Okay what?"


"That's better. Now, Billy-boy, tell me why you like to hang out at the bus depot toilet."

"I wasn't hanging out, just using the facilities."

"Liar. I saw your hard dick."

"You did?"

"I think you're one of those dick lickers, a peter eater."

"No, I've never--"

"Don't get many of them in these parts. When we do we run them out of town. This is Bible Belt country. Queers are the scum of the earth."

"I ain't no queer."

When Detective Neal reached down between his beefy thighs and groped himself, the steering wheel put a dent in his belly. "This is what you like. Dick, right?"

"No, sir."

"Don't lie to me, boy," he barked.

"I've never done nothing like that."

"Maybe so. But you want to, don't you?"

"No, sir."

"Boy, you're getting me mad. I can tell by the look in your eye that you want to hop on my rod. I'll bet you got a big bone on now. See, look at yourself.

I couldn't hide my straining hard-on. It was making a tent in my britches. And a spurt of pre-cum had leaked through my briefs.

"Take out my cock," the cop insisted.


"You heard me."

I couldn't believe it. The big cop wanted me to take out his cock! "For real?" I gasped.

"Do it."

"You won't hurt me, sir?"

"C'mon, I haven't got all day."

I did it, like he asked. When I unzipped those tan slacks, I discovered he was wearing white cotton briefs. Then I took his cock out of the flap and learned that it was fat, clipped, and growing! Hell! I thought I'd pop my nuts when I touched that fiery prick of his.

"Jack it. Get it hard," the cop directed me.

When I fondled it, it expanded into a real big boner. Every bit of eight inches. And thick. Real thick.


"Wanna taste it, boy?"

"Yes, sir."

"Go for it."

It wasn't so easy to get at it below his belly and the steering wheel. But he sort of shifted sideways and I managed. Then I took a good look at that fat slab of cock with its prominent veins and purplish cock-head.

"Lick it."

I tongued the shaft, eager to please him. "Oh yeah, baby. That's good ... Now the knob. Suck the knob."

The head of his cock was huge and it took some lip-stretching to get my mouth around it. But I managed to do it. You bet I did!

"That's it ... Watch them teeth ... Oh, yeah, you're a natural. Slurp on that dick. Make it hard as a rock. Make it shoot."

I bobbed my head up and down on his fuck-pole. It wasn't easy in that cramped space. But where there's a will, there's a way.

"It's hard ... ready. Gonna shoot! Oh, baby, take it. Eat my load of scum."

I tried but the onslaught of cum was too fast. Big salty globs came barreling into my mouth. I swallowed and swallowed but I could feel a lot of it trickle out the sides of my mouth. Then I came up for air, licking my chops.

"Like it, don't you, punk? Cop jizz turns you on, doesn't it?"

"Oh, yes, sir. You taste good."

"You can beat off if you like."

"I'm real hot, sir ... Won't take me long to shoot."

"Do it, baby. Do it for daddy."

I liked that, the big cop wanted to watch me pull my pud. In a flash I freed my stiffer. Then I wrapped my hand around it and gave it a yank.

"Wow! That's whopper."

"Nothing like yours, sir."

"Go ahead, beat it."

Sitting on the passenger side of the unmarked cop car, I fisted my prick. I could feel his eyes on me. But I wished he'd touch my cock, figuring I'd shoot instantly if he did.

"You like it? Wanna see it shoot?"

"Yeah baby, shoot that load."

I gritted my teeth and stroked my cock faster and faster. I could feel the cum churning in my balls. Then a low moan spilled from my lips.

"Here it cums, sir." I shot off with wild abandon, spurting cum all over my clothes. But I didn't care. I was doing it for an appreciative audience, the local fuzz.

"You're something else, kid. You're a real winner, you know that? Look at my cock. It's still hard."

"Want me to suck it again, sir?" "That won't be necessary. Lift up, I'm moving over."

It felt like an earthquake when Detective Neal scooted over into the passenger seat. I didn't know how this was going to work. But I sat on his lap and prepared to make the best of the situation.

After the big cop unbuttoned my shirt, his long wet tongue licked my chest. He nibbled my nipples. And that drove me wild, making my cock throb with renewed vigor.

Under his direction I lifted up and he tugged down my jeans. I guess he wanted to see my body and I was proud to show him my swarthy, muscular build. But after a glance at the merchandise, he grabbed hold of my dick and began to fondle my nuts. Then he fingered my crack and stuck a chubby finger up my hole.

"You wanna fuck me?" I squirmed on his finger, horny as hell.

"Oh, yeah, baby. I want you to sit on my cock."

By now I was so hot that I'd have done anything he wanted. I'd had fantasies about being buggered by a big man but I'd always worried that he'd crush me. I had never thought about sitting on it. But when the cop sucked on his chubby finger and wedged it in my butthole, lubing and stretching it, the idea grew all the more appealing.

"I want your big dick up inside me. I want you to fuck me," I cried.

"Take it, baby. Take my big meat up your tight little hole. Oh yeah, that's it. Let it go in. Oooh."

"It hurts! It fucking hurts," I yelped, discovering that his cock felt like a fire plug lodged in my ass.

"You got such a hot little ass. A cherry hole too, I bet. Ride it, ride my dick!"

I lifted up and bounced my ass up and down on the cop's fat pole. I felt it tearing up my insides but I didn't care. It felt so good inside me that I soon forgot about the pain.

"You're such a big man. A macho cop who likes to fuck guys. Do it! Screw my hole! Pump it! Shoot your fucking load into my guts," I hollered.

He held my hips and thrust that enormous cop-cock in and out, deeper and deeper until it got hard as a rock. "Get ready, baby. It's cumming! Oh shit! Shooting my fucking cum up your tight boy butt. Take it, baby. Take it all!"

I sat down on that steely cock spurting wads and wads of hot cop fuck-juice into my guts. Then I worked my ass muscles on that cock, clenching it, milking it until it was drained of his ball-juice and my butthole was creamed and leaking the excess. But my cock was throbbing and begging for more action.

"Wanna fuck daddy?" The cop let his meat slither out of my hole, tossing me a sly grin.

"Sure." I wasn't sure how this would work. But being a veteran cop and obviously an experienced asshole fucker and fuckee, Officer Neal got his pants and shorts down around his ankles and positioned his feet on the dashboard. Then I crawled between those tree trunk-sized thighs and my cock instantly knew what to do.

Spitting on his palm, the cop lubed his crack. Since I was drooling plenty of pre-cum, I had no trouble getting the head of my dick planted into his hole. Suddenly he pushed forward and I was in like Flynn, the head and the shaft disappearing down past the circumcision scar.

He fondled his cock while I pumped his hole. Even if it seemed as awkward as refueling a jumbo jet in flight, I gritted my teeth and rode him, shoving as much meat as I could up his ass and making him feel it.

"Fuck me, kid. Oh yeah, that's it. Go as deep as you can. Now I can feel it! So big and hard and juicy! Do it, baby. Cum up my ass!"

I plugged away at his hole, loving the feeling of my cock being buried between his brawny thighs with his big paws clutching my back. It was like being mauled by a bear because he was so hairy but I just loved it. When I was ready to blast I rammed in every inch possible and let out a grunt. Then my cum spurted deep inside him and whitewashed his asshole and his body shook like a tub-full of Jell-O.

"Oh, you shoot such a big load. Feels so good, baby. You're a natural stud," the cop praised my maiden attempt at butt-fucking.

But all too soon my cock softened and slipped out. It was covered with goo. So I lifted up in the confines of the car and wiped it on his luscious lips. Then the cop cleaned off my cock and licked his chops.

Unable to resist, I got back down between his fleshy thighs and bathed his cock with spit, lapping up the residue of cum that coated his loins. I could have stayed down there for hours. But after a while Officer Neal held me in his arms and gently kissed me on the mouth. The bittersweet taste of the mixture of our loads clung to my lips. Then the cop wrapped his big arms around me and made me feel all warm inside.

This all happened several years ago but I still think of Detective Neal sometimes when I whack off. He may have been my first partner in man-to-man sex. But he was the last big man who had to threaten to arrest me to get some action. Now I go after them. In fact there's nothing I love more than to lie around and chew the fat and you could say I've become a real chubby chaser. But hell! I can't help it that I like living in the fat lane!


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